Bachelor in Paradise and Rape Culture 

C.N. sexual assault, gaslighting, language

Look, I’m not going to get into the various details about what’s now looking like an alleged sexual assault or, at a minimum “improper contact” between Demario and Corinne. You can find that pretty much any and everywhere online.

I just need a quick rant about our pervasive  rape culture and the comments I keep seeing about this incident, even by people I fucking know should know better than this. If you see yourself in this rant, maybe do some goddamn soul searching.


Rape culture is when allegations of a sexual assault committed against a public figure come out, and people—even those who claim to understand how consent works in any and every other context—say

  • “Oh, well she’s a ho/slut/skank anyway”
  • “If you watched the show, you know she’s a drunk. So it’s her fault.”
  • “Oh suuuuure she blacked out. This is her M.O.”
  • “I’m sure she made this up so her boyfriend wouldn’t get mad. Have you seen how she acts?”
  • “She gets drunk and comes on to men. It’s what she does. Didn’t you watch??”

Look, I don’t give a flying fuzznut how easy someone is or how intoxicated they sometimes can get. Consent is consent. If someone is too drunk to give consent, it doesn’t matter if they gave consent to 100 other people earlier that afternoon. The one person/one time they didn’t/couldn’t, that one time is rape. In fact, hell, I’m willing to make the argument that if someone is proudly promiscuous, the fact that they tell you they weren’t trying to get down this time should carry some weight.

I don’t know what happened or what didn’t happen. I wasn’t there. I haven’t seen any tapes. I have no inside knowledge from a reliable source. I just know that I’m seeing a lot of people who claim to understand what sexual assault is and isn’t show their asses because the alleged victim happens to be on a raunchy ass show [which, full disclosure, I don’t watch, because it grosses me out], as though that discounts the fact that something happened she may not have wanted to.

Sluts get raped.

Sex workers get raped.

Lushes get raped.

Cheaters get raped.

The fact that an alleged victim doesn’t fit your personal morality preference doesn’t make the issue any less serious.

Stop being an asshole.

Season 9 of The Big Bang Theory is NOT for Preggos

This should go without saying, but if you haven’t watched the latest episode of The Big Bang Theory, this article contains spoilers. Read at your own risk. But, seriously, you should’ve been able to figure that out from the title.


 

The Big Bang Theory has been one of my favorite shows since it first aired. Dr. Sheldon Cooper has always had a special place in my heart because, in addition to being funny as all get out, he (like his portrayer, Jim Parsons) hails from the Greater Houston Area. I’ve also loved Miyam Bialik since Blossom, and her portrayal as Amy has been one of the best additions to the show [okay, Bernadette is the best, because… I mean…]. I ship for Shamy… HARD. So the end of Season 8, watching my beloved Sheldon have his heartbroken as Amy (for good reason) dumped him right before he was about to propose….Ugh. I couldn’t take it. But this season has been far worse. Why? Because I’m pregnant and hormonal, and I cannot deal with this emotional roller coaster!

Penny and Leonard breaking up briefly at the beginning of Season 9? Meh. They’ve done it a million times. Over it. But watching Sheldon mend his broken heart and Amy date around? Devastating. I don’t think there’s been a single episode that hasn’t elicited at least one hyper-hormonal tear from me this entire season. Then last week… Amy decided that she was finally ready to take Sheldon back, only for him to respond:

Amy, I excel at many things, but getting over you wasn’t one of them.”

OMG! What???? I cried, y’all. Big, ugly, boohoos. I mean, look… I knew the breakup wouldn’t last, because CBS had already spilled the beans about Shamy finally doing the deed in the December 17th episode. But that doesn’t mean that it wasn’t still absolutely devastating watching  how pained these two are by their situation.

Despite all of that, I thought I would be okay. I thought there couldn’t be much more that TBBT could throw at me and all these hormonal shifts that I couldn’t take. WRONG! Oh so wrong!

In episode 10 of the season (“The Earworm Reverberation”), Sheldon has a tune stuck in his head that he cannot place. He believes he is losing his mind, and in turn drives himself, Leonard, and Penny crazy as he tries to figure out what the song is. It suddenly dawns on him when he’s thinking of all the “greats” who were driven mad (including Brian Wilson, apparently?) that the tune is “Darlin’,” a Beach Boys song. Sheldon then figures out that the reason the song is stuck in his head is because it is about Amy. Sheldon races to Amy’s apartment where she is on a date with Dave (the always funny, gentle giant Steve Merchant), her date from episode 8, who she refused to see again because of his obsession with Sheldon. As can almost be expected, Dave encourages Amy to get back with his hero, Sheldon Cooper. Amy and Sheldon kiss, and my tears flowed.

big-bang-theory-season-9-earworm-reverberation-shamy-kiss

These weren’t just normal tears running down my face, y’all [Pop Culture Dad had those, which is how I know I wasn’t totally crazy for crying]; these were big, heavy, full-chested, ugly tears. And I couldn’t stop!!

I know the next episode (where Shamy finally does the deed) is supposed to be quite comical, but I don’t know if I’ll be able to take it. Two people in love, finally reunited, and losing their virginity to each other? And all this happening while Sheldon is still hanging on to the engagement ring he never got to give Amy in the Season 8 finale? I don’t care how great the humor is, I don’t know if my heart (well, my hormones, really) is going to be able take that!

Honestly, I should probably forego any television while I remain emotionally unpredictable, especially shows like TBBT, where I am so invested in some of the characters [um… but not you, Howard]. I know, however, that I won’t be able to resist watching.

Long Live Shamy!!!

GIVEWAY ALERT! The Veronica Mars Movie is HERE

OMG, OMG, OMG, y’all! The Veronica Mars movie is here!
 
I’ll be the first to admit, despite having friends who swore by the show, I was late to the Veronica Mars game. In fact, I watched it for the first time EVER last month. Actually, “binge watched” is a more accurate description. I watched all three seasons over the course of three weeks. At some point during my Season 2 viewing, Pop Culture Dad said to me, “You’re an addict.” It’s sooooo true!
 
I started watching it out of sheer curiosity, since Amazon Prime finally started offering all three seasons for free. My curiosity paid off in spades, particularly after I found out that the much-anticipated Veronica Mars movie was coming out March 14th. Goddess bless you, Princess Anna… er… Kristen Bell and all those VM fans on Kickstarter for making this happen!
 
Anywhoo… To get everyone primed and ready for the movie release [like we weren’t already], Warner Bros. has released a Veronica Mars Marshmallow Super-Fan Purity Test [c’mon… Click it!]:

Veronica Mars: Purity Test Marshmallow Super-fan Trivia – Think you know all there is to know about Neptune, California? Test your Veronica Mars knowledge with all 3 levels of super-fan trivia and find out if you are the ultimate Marshmallow

Additionally, the DVD, which is scheduled to come out some time in May, is already available for pre-order. AND…. *drumroll*…

ONE OF YOU LUCKY MARSHMALLOWS CAN WIN IT FOR FREE!
You heard me. Warner Bros. Is going to provide one luckily Pop Culture Mom Blog winner with a free copy of the Veronica Mars Movie DVD when it is released.
Here’s how to enter:
Mandatory: Like the Pop Culture Mom Facebook page.
Optional: 
(1) Take all three levels of the Purity Test and leave a comment below with your scores
(2) Tweet to me @popculturemom and tell me if you’re #TeamDuncan, #TeamLogan, or #TeamPiz. Add the hashtag #VeronicaMarsMovie. If you have enough characters, go ahead and say why [FTR, I’m #TeamLogan, but I won’t hold it against you if you aren’t]
(3) Leave a comment on the Pop Culture Mom Facebook page letting me know your favorite episode or scene.
You have to be logged into Rafflecopter (below) for the entries to count:
DISCLOSURES:
Contest begins at midnight on March 14, 2014. Entrants must reside in the United States or Canada. Each household is only eligible to win One (1) Veronica Mars DVD via blog reviews and giveaways. Only one entrant per mailing address per giveaway. If you have won the same prize on another blog, you will not be eligible to win it again. Winner is subject to eligibility verification. The prize can only be shipped to physical addresses; no P.O. Boxes please.
 
Entries may be received until 11:59 p.m. CDT on March 26, 2014. Winner will be notified within 24 hours. If no valid address is provided within 48 hours of notification, the prize will forfeited, and a new winner will be selected and notified.
About the Veronica Mars Movie
On the eve of graduating law school, Veronica Mars has put Neptune and her amateur sleuthing days behind her. While interviewing at high-end New York law firms, Veronica Mars gets a call from her ex-boyfriend Logan who has been accused of murder. Veronica heads back to Neptune just to help Logan find an attorney, but when things don’t seem right with how Logan’s case is perceived and handled, Veronica finds herself being pulled back into a life she thought she had left behind.
See it In Theaters MARCH 14
Pre-order on DIGITAL HD
ABOUT HOW THE FILM GOT MADE:
Following a record-breaking Kickstarter campaign that ended on April 12, 2013, Veronica Mars was shot over 23 days during June-July 2013. It will be released in selected theaters nationwide on March 14th, 2014.
All promotional materials and the prize are supplied by Warner Bros.

 

I am the Biracial Whisperer (or Maybe I have Biracialdar?)

I was watching ‘Suits’ this morning and actually paying close attention for a change. There was a close up of Rachel (played by Meghan Markle) taking the LSATs. I saw her freckles and hair and immediately and excitedly blurted (out loud, sadly), “OMG! She’s biracial!” For some reason, I always had assumed she was Hispanic, even though “Zane” (her character’s last name) isn’t a particularly Latino name. But there wasn’t any mistaking the HD closeup. I Googled “Meghan Markle biracial,” and BOOM, there it was. Just like my kids, her mom is black, and her father is white of Irish descent.

Meghan Markle and her mother (from her Instagram)

Mariah Carey… Jennifer Beals… Rashida Jones… Soledad O’Brien…  Vin Diesel… Wentworth Miller… and now Rachel Markle. Even before seeing some “OMG! She looks white, but SURPRISE!!” article, I could tell they were biracial. Look, I know I am not the only one. There are probably a lot of you reading this going, “Duh! I knew too!” But, just like when a celebrity comes out as gay or lesbian, there’s something oddly wonderful and fantastic to me about finding the closeted (whether it is simply because the issue has never been raised or addressed because here’s no necessity to it or because a record company or TV producer intentionally wanted to leave the impression that the performer is white) biracial people.

I also get people who don’t understand my excitement about these discoveries. But for those people, when someone asks you if or implies that you are the nanny of your own child, you’ll get it.